A Bittersweet Goodbye, An Unwelcome Hello

We all know it. We all hear it. We all love it (this is actually extremely questionable). But it seems as if the April in the D song, so synonymous with the start of the baseball season on Fox Sports Detroit, is not going to be renewed this year.

This is a very love/hate situation for all of us. On one hand, by the end of April you want to throw your TV out the window when watching Tigers games, if only to rid our heads of the incessant "April April in the D! FOX SPORTS DETROIT ON YOUR TEE VEEEEE!" Brings back memories, huh?

On the other paw, the April in the D song signifies the start of the most glorious part of the year: Baseball Season. It's been a tradition for, what, four years now? And we've gotten used to reviewing all the finalists and picking our favorites (who never seem to win, but whatever). Plus, it's the namesake of this freaking blog!

FSD has other ideas, though. Due to the overwhelming success amongst male Tiger fans and general hatred from the female ones, the network has decided to hold The Next Fox Sports Detroit Girl Search in hopes that they will find "talent" akin to Lauren and Ashley (is that her name? Whatever).

We've said it before: the FSD girls are hardly our favorite thing about watching Tigers games. In fact, we'd almost rather watch Fox games announced by Joe Buck then have to sit through 10 + commercials a game with Lauren/Ashley simpering and strutting for the camera. This isn't the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show.

We've beat that horse pretty dead, we know. But if you're going to do that, why can't we just have Brennan Boesch or Rick Porcello or Austin Jackson in some smoldering ads as well? We need to give the ladies something to look at, too. Equal rights!!!!!

Anyway, this marks the dawn of a new age for Aprils in Detroit. Who knows if they will use some kind of April in the D song? At any rate, if they do use one, it won't be from a contest. Which might mean it could be a less-annoying April than usual in the D. We could get used to that.

As a final farewell to the April in the D contest, here is a very good rendition of the song by the band The Product. We love it. Too bad it won't be featured on FSD this year….enjoy!

A Commentary on Sports Feminism

I told everyone that I would do this (a Random Tigers Thoughts from Laura) post on Tuesday, but its been a pretty rotten week, and I am only just getting to this now. But after my night tonight, this post should be filled with the rage and passion it so desperately requires. This is no longer a Random Thought; instead, it has evolved into a full-fledged commentary on a very personal subject that is close to all three of our hearts.

The three of us were on our way to our first game of the season together at Comerica Park tonight (Saturday night). It was a gloomy day, cloudy and overcast with no hint of sunshine. If only we knew the shit that was going to come, we wouldn't have gone. But whatever.

First of all, when my sisters and I go to Tigers games, we don't like to look bad. In fact, since it is our disgustingly desperate lifelong dream to date a Tigers player (kidding. Not really. Yeah, we're kidding. Kind of.), we like to look nice. Not slutty, stupid, BumpIt-wearing bimbo-type "nice," but nice. So when people (men especially) act surprised and mock us when they realize we know what we're talking about when it comes to baseball, it pisses us off. And let it be said that this happened more than once today. Then of course, the skies opened up and the game was washed away. But while we waited for the Comerica powers-that-be to tell us that the game was called, we were thinking not of our future husbands, but of a woman. A very specific woman, known to all FSDetroit viewers.

That's right, FSD resident hot-chick-of-the-moment, "Lauren." For the past few months, both on this blog and in the privacy of our home, we have slighted, bashed and berated "Lauren" because of her sensual commercials and her, stripper-like exotic good looks. She is everything the modern-day feminist rejects and everything that the modern-day beer-swilling ex-fratboy embraces. She's beautiful, she wears tight shirts that show off her definitely real chest, and she adds a certain pizzaz to FSD commercials that apparently the actual athletes who play the games we are watching cannot. 


But, while at that sham of a game Saturday night, and being stared at and catcalled like we were pieces of meat, we began to empathize with our sister, "Lauren." I wonder why some men assume that women are unable to understand sports. Instead of bashing Lauren, who on her FSD profile says she loves the Pistons as well as the Tigers, we should accept her into our fold as a fellow sports-lovin' gal. Any woman who promotes a healthy interest in athletics should be celebrated, not persecuted. Go Lauren!


However.


Fox Sports Detroit, you should be ashamed of yourself. How dare you subscribe to the easy-out male advertising pattern of objectifying good-looking women by using their bodies and seductive natures to sell beer, sports, real-estate, peanut butter, what have you. We can guarantee that close to half of your audience does not want to see a twenty-something chick purring into the camera between innings. What is this saying to young girls?! That all they're good for is using their bodies to promote men playing sports? Something which women's bodies has absolutely nothing to do with?!?!?! This is hardly a way to encourage and raise female participation in athletics. If more girls liked sports, then more girls would watch baseball, and your viewership would increase that way, dumbasses. 


Also, what does this say to the girls that know their sports? That FSD doesn't value their business? We watch FSD to watch our favorite sports teams: the Red Wings, the Pistons, and especially the Tigers. We don't watch it to see Lauren pose and smile mindlessly. 


Look. We don't want to give people the wrong impression. We like Fox Sports Detroit. We also enjoy taking pride in our appearances. But so do men. And you don't see FSD thrusting a shirtless Rick Porcello in front of the camera. While that would be a sweet sight, it has nothing to do with baseball (but hey, it has more so to do with baseball than Lauren does). While we state often on this blog about how cute or how hot a certain player might be, we don't go overboard. We don't really want to see random men being objectified same as we don't want to see women objectified. Women know sports. We should be treated as equals, not as eye candy.


So, though we may ramble and rant, we know we are not alone when it comes to our issues with FSD and its advertising choices. And as for Lauren? More power to ya, sister.

Sound Off!

http://www.foxsportsdetroit.com/pages/aprilinthed

So a few days ago we reported that FSDetroit was about to announce their semifinalists for their much-anticipated April in the D theme song contest. Well, just a day later they revealed their choices for the 10 semifinalists, and we as the constituency must vote for our desired top 3 finalists. You can check out the semifinalists in all of their glory here, and as an added bonus you can read our heartfelt critiques below! We don't claim to be music critics here at April in the D, but we do know what we personally would like to hear every inning during the month of April. We know it has nothing to do with the game of baseball, but...just deal with it! Join us after the jump!

Sweet, Sweet Music

It's funny how, after such a boring offseason, as soon as Spring Training starts everything goes crazy. And not just in bad ways. Miguel is getting help, thank God, so hopefully he will be blasting 400 feet HRs soon enough, in the loving embrace of his Tigers family. Also, today is the day that the whole team reported for the first official full-squad practice! Finally! Finally! After three and a half months of bleak, baseball-less winter, Spring Training is here to bring meaning back into our lives.

If all of that wasn't enough to put a smile on your face, check this out. As we were perusing the web today looking for interesting baseball tidbits, we found this. If you're too lazy to click on the provided link, then we'll just go ahead an tell you what it is: FSDetroit's April in the D song contest 2011!!!!!

Yes, the song that inspired this blog is going to be recreated again for the magical 2011 season. On the website you can find past April in the D song winners from 2008-10. Our personal favorite was The Good Luck Joes' stunning rendition from 2009. That was the soundtrack to my April two years ago. Last year's winner by Victorious Secret was just so-so (they moved on to bigger and better things, though--namely, Freecreditreport.com commercials) but this year's competition holds such promise! 

First of all, the judges: all you need to know here is that Kid Rock is judging. Awesome. Kid Rock knows rock and the D. We also like the choices of Brad Stuart, the sexy accomplished defenseman from the Red Wings, and Mickey York, who is to Tigers Live what Al Roker is to the Today Show. We're not sure what they have to do with music, but they know the D. The other judges (especially ones with names like "Treasure"--what is she, a stripper?) are a little suspect, but overall this is promising!

However, as fun as it may be, we don't think this competition is necessary. We should just have Eminem do it! Hello?! It would be perfect. His new album, in which he shares his struggles with addiction and how he overcame it, is kick-ass. He obviously knows the D and music in general. He's intimidating as hell. All of this embodies our 2011 Detroit Tigers!!!! I mean, obviously people like Clete Thomas and Will Rhymes aren't too intimidating, but we're talking the team as a whole. Would it be good? It would be the sickest April in the D ever. Family friendly? Maybe not, but thats not what we're going for here. We're going for original. 

Despite Eminem or someone just as cool not singing the April in the D theme, we're very excited for this contest, not just because we can't wait to hear the entries, but because April is drawing nearer and nearer. Hurry up, Spring!!!