ANYWAYS, Spring Training games are officially underway, and our brilliant team has cranked out a 3-0 start, not that it matters. They took down the hated Yankees yesterday, so that can only be a good thing. Those three wins were mostly thanks to our pitchers, but today we're going to look at a different position(s): the outfield.
So Raburn, AJax, and Magglio seem to have the outfield positions all locked up. Or do they? We are going to take an in-depth look at not just the skills of these ballplayers, but their personality, looks, fan-appeal, looks....you know, the important stuff!
Austin Jackson (AJax)
Probably the only player who is a lock for an outfield spot, Austin Jackson was so good last year that he made us completely forget about Curtis Granderson. This is quite the feat, since we were the girls who openly wept when he was traded. Now, after seeing what a genius Dave Dombrowski is for making that deal, we are AJax's biggest supporters. He's young, attractive, and kind, though he can't get the right enunciation for the phrase "fair share". Even though he'll never be as beloved as Curtis was in the D, it's our firm belief that he'll be much better.
Brennan Boesch (Baby B)
Oh, baby Brennan. After such a successful first half, Brennan failed to impress in the second (and most important) part of the season. Will he win the spot reserve spot this year, or will Casper Wells steal it away from him? Either way, he'll look good doing it--his Cali-boy swag and strong physique have us (Rosie!!!) praying he'll make the 25-man roster. One can only hope that he will produce the same ridiculous stats he racked up in the first half. Yeah, sure.
Casper Wells (Ghostboy)
This Friendly Ghost is poised to overtake Brennan Boesch and fill our team quota of white-baller-who-wishes-he-was-black. Have you seen his tweets?!...Anyway, Ghostboy tore up the Big Leagues in the brief time he was there last year, and we think he will make the roster over Baby B this year. Once he gets more exposure, the fans in the D are probably going to love him. He obviously loves to connect with fans and is proud to be on the Tigers, so more power to him. Plus, he's kind of witty . Who doesn't love that?!
Clete Thomas (The Cleteus)
Ah, Clete. We're slightly embarrassed to say (especially after his performance last year) that we used to have a bit of a Clete Thomas Obsession. So much so that we hated Don Kelly when he came up for Clete in the 2009 season, and always scoffed at Rod Allen for his criticism. Now all of these feelings have passed, and it's time for us to get real about Clete's chances in the bigs this season. We don't think it's going to happen. Despite his redneck charm and deer-in-headlights smolder, Clete would have to have a hell of a spring training to beat out the likes of Don, Casper and Brennan.
Don Kelly (Don Kelly)
Don Kelly can do it all, and that's why he's definitely going to make the squad this year. He can play outfield, third base, first base, and supposedly catcher. There's no way, that with our surplus of injury-prone Venezuelans, we won't need a back-up in SOME position, and Don is the perfect guy to do it. As far as looks go, have you seen this guy in person? TV doesn't do him justice. Too bad he has the cutest kids ever...
Magglio Ordonez (Maggs)
The Tiger's answer to Fabio until he cut his hair, Magglio is the kind of player that makes both coaches and desperate housewives swoon (for very different reasons, obviously). We here at April in the D were terrified that last year would be his last in the Motor City, but Dombrowski flashed his genius once again and Maggs is here to stay (at least for the year)! Hopefully he doesn't run into any health issues -we all saw the affect his absence had on our team last year. So here's looking at a great 2011, Magglio--and please, grow that fabulous hair back.
Ryan Raburn (Ry Ry)
There's something about Ryan. You know what we're talking about. Just when you think he's starting to really suck big time, he goes crazy and hit .400 for the month of August. He claims that he does better when he knows he's going to play, and all evidence points that he's telling the truth. If he can be as productive as he was the tail end of last season, he's in for one monster year. We're rooting for ya!
Agree? Disagree? Let us know!