ALDS Games 1&2: A Series of Fortunate Events

First things first: 2-0, BABY!!! TWO GAMES UP!!! ONE GAME FROM CLINCHING!!! EAT IT, OAKLAND!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh, those silly Tigers! Giving us such bad breathing and heart problems that we almost pass out/die! Making those two games (especially Game 2, good GAWD) as close as close can be! Making us literally shriek in terror in public places and scream like we're being murdered but we're actually just watching a Don Kelly (!!!) walk-off sac fly! YOU SILLY, SILLY PEOPLE!!!!

Game 1 wasn't so terrifying. After Verlander gave up a leadoff home run, he was dominant, going seven innings and only allowing a handful of hits. The offense gave us just enough breathing room to comfortably get the win, and the Tigers won what might have been their most important game: one that Verlander pitched. Also, fun fact: Alex Avila's home run was the only RBI that was a hit. All of the Tigers other runs in the series so far have come from sacrifices, outs, or errors on Oakland's part.

Speaking of Oakland--they may be So Hot Right Now, but they were as sloppy as the Tigers were these past two games. Youth and energy works well for a race to the playoffs, but will Oakland do to us what they did to Texas and sweep? We don't think so. The energy in Oakland will be amazing, but we think our boys have enough experience and moxie to take the A's down.

We like that word. Moxie. We should use it more often.

Moxie is also not a word not often applied to Don Kelly (at least we don't think so) but he definitely had it in spades when he hit that amazing, breathtaking, majestic grand slam sac fly to help Detroit take Game 2.  And what a Game it was! After the fearsome pitchers duel that was Doug Fister and some Random Lefty The Tigers Should Have Taken Advantage Of But Didn't, the bullpens of both teams turned the game into an absolute vortex of a shit storm. 

Errors were made, wild pitches were thrown, and heart attacks were induced by both sides. When the dust settled, Al Albuquerque had kissed a baseball (truth) and Joaquin Benoit had given up two stolen bases, a wild pitch and a home run, but SOME HOW we were still tied at the bottom of the 9th.

And then Don Kelly happened.

Infante and Cabrera singled and Fielder walked to give our boys the bases loaded with one out and Don Kelly to the plate. Now, we could see what was going to happen. Good ol' DK was gonna ground into a Tigers-patented double play or strike out. He had never walked-off before. Who said he was gonna do it now?

Don Kelly said, that's who. He hit a soaring sac fly that left no doubt that the victory belonged to the Tigers, and our boys rushed the field in what could have been the most empowering and heartwarming moment of the season thus far. Us fans laughed, cried, and passed out from exhaustion/relief/joy. This just goes to show: in the playoffs, anyone can be a hero. And that day it was Don Kelly.

Ah, but really--bless those boys. Because now we're going into Oakland needing to only win one game. It's no secret: we would LOVE to just clobber those guys now and be done with it, but we're not naive. We know Oakland is going to try and give it everything they've got tonight. They have to. But then again, so will we. 

Let's end this tonight, boys. To battle we go  !

Random Tigers Thoughts from Laura 7/3/11

So, this is kind of a good news/bad news post, people. The good news is obvious:

ALEX AVILA IS STARTING THE ALL-STAR GAME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

There is some justice in the world after all. Down by over 400,000 votes, somehow Tiger Nation rallied together and gave our boy the starting spot. As happy as I am about this, I can't help but think that the MLB powers-that-be helped out a little. Either that, or we are the best freaking fans ever. Take that, Yankee scum!

Also, JV and Miggy were voted in. Justin was obvious, but Cabrera had some stiff competition from Paul Konerko. So huge congrats to them both! Jose Valverde was selected to the team as well, and V-Mart is tagged as one of the five finalists for the fan vote final spot. Normally this would be cause for celebration, but I can't help feeling sorry for Juh-honny Peralta. He deserved it more than Valverde and more than V-Mart, too, and while I'm happy for everyone, it enrages me to see creaky, overrated Yankee Derek Jeter in Juh-honny's rightful place. I call bullshit on that one...

Speaking of bullshit, it has just been announced that Rick Knapp has been fired. Um...okay? Yes, our pitchers have been outrageously bad these past few weeks, but weren't are starters kicking ass about a month ago? I guess the Tigers superiors thought someone had to take the fall for this. If it works, that's fantastic, but I don't think it's going to make that much of a difference. A lot of the starting pitchers really liked him too, but it's obviously not all about likability. Still...couldn't they have fired someone else? Gene? Lloyd??

I'm obviously not a fan of those two, or this decision. Rogo over at DesignateRobertson has a funnier take on this mess. Go read it if you haven't and be prepared to laugh.

Also another thing: I'm noticing a stupid pattern with Don "Use Somebody" Kelly. Every time our boys start getting destroyed, Don enters the game in a ridiculous position, like behind the plate with a hockey mask or on the freaking mound. Okay, obviously this isn't a pattern--it's not V-Mart's fault he got banged up--but I don't like to see Don Kelly behind the plate, and as amusing as it is to see his nervous, sweet face on the mound, I never want to see him there again. Barring another massacre, we probably never will, but I like my Don Kelly spazzing in the outfield or at third, not anywhere else!

A final word: Vote, good people, vote! As sad as I am that Juh-honny won't be representing the D, we need to get V-Mart to Arizona!!!!!!! SO VOTE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(PS-is it bad that I really wouldn't mind too much if Konerko went instead? He deserves it...but so does Victor!!! But you better believe I will be voting a zillion times for our boy!)

The Ballad of Danny Worth

Picture by the Detroit News

Though it hurts us to say this, it must be said: Ryan Raburn should not be a full-time player. We at April in the D have been his biggest champions throughout the years, always bringing up his freak months where he hits over .400 and frequently bringing up his spectacular errors in the outfield fondly (falling through doors, dropping then kicking a ball, hitting a ball over the wall for a HR, etc.). But now it sickens us to see him starting almost everyday, bringing as much usefulness to the lineup as a pitcher (although pitchers can draw bases-loaded walks, right Rick Porcello?!?!). 

Also, if you're going to mention Ryan Raburn, you have to mention Don Kelly in the same breath. Why is he starting everyday? The bigger question: why is he batting second?! You may point out that with Inge on the DL, we have no other options. Well, people, we do. We have a man who could play for both Raburn and Kelly. Remember him? His name is danny worth. 

You may ask, why such a small text size for danny's name? Because a) Rod Allen never fails to point out how quiet danny is in the clubhouse, and b) Jim Leyland apparently doesn't know he exists. How come Mighty Mouse and Scott Sizemore got their chances to start at second base and danny didn't? Really, people? Ryan Raburn is not even a remotely good option anymore. He can't hit, and we obviously know he can't field. When danny worth has actually been given a chance to have some at-bats, he's hit .400 and has an OPS of .955. That's certainly better than anyone else has done in 20 at-bats, and no doubt he's hitting better than Ryan Raburn will anytime soon. 

We all know that when Inge comes up, danny will be packing his bags for Toledo. Why doesn't he get a decent chance? Does Leyland just not like him? Does he not see him as an everyday player? That's bullshit, in our opinion. Anything would be better than Raburn at this point, but it looks like time is winding down for poor, sweet danny. He never had a chance. 

Let's hope Crazy Phil Coke can shut down the Rockies tonight. It won't be fun to watch a game like last nights, unless we're the ones bringing the pain. The thought of the Indians alone in first again makes us ill.

One final note: You know how on SI.com they have that "Weekend Clicks" section or whatever where they have a hot woman of the week for no good reason? Well, we would like to have our own version of  Weekend Clicks, except with baseball players, for all you girls out there. It's called Player of the Week. They won't necessarily be from the Tigers, but this Player of the Week is none other than Austin Jackson! Take a peek. He was named one of the best-dressed people in Detroit a while back, and it shows. Work it, Austin. 

Angels in the Outfield

Sorry to all of our many readers (hahahahaha) that we're not posting as frequently. We're pretty busy--its called college. You remember it.
ANYWAYS, Spring Training games are officially underway, and our brilliant team has cranked out a 3-0 start, not that it matters. They took down the hated Yankees yesterday, so that can only be a good thing. Those three wins were mostly thanks to our pitchers, but today we're going to look at a different position(s): the outfield.

So Raburn, AJax, and Magglio seem to have the outfield positions all locked up. Or do they? We are going to take an in-depth look at not just the skills of these ballplayers, but their personality, looks, fan-appeal, looks....you know, the important stuff!


Austin Jackson (AJax)





Probably the only player who is a lock for an outfield spot, Austin Jackson was so good last year that he made us completely forget about Curtis Granderson. This is quite the feat, since we were the girls who openly wept when he was traded. Now, after seeing what a genius Dave Dombrowski is for making that deal, we are AJax's biggest supporters. He's young, attractive, and kind, though he can't get the right enunciation for the phrase "fair share". Even though he'll never be as beloved as Curtis was in the D, it's our firm belief that he'll be much better.

Brennan Boesch (Baby B)



Oh, baby Brennan. After such a successful first half, Brennan failed to impress in the second (and most important) part of the season. Will he win the spot reserve spot this year, or will Casper Wells steal it away from him? Either way, he'll look good doing it--his Cali-boy swag and strong physique have us (Rosie!!!) praying he'll make the 25-man roster. One can only hope that he will produce the same ridiculous stats he racked up in the first half. Yeah, sure.


Casper Wells (Ghostboy)





This Friendly Ghost is poised to overtake Brennan Boesch and fill our team quota of white-baller-who-wishes-he-was-black. Have you seen his tweets?!...Anyway, Ghostboy tore up the Big Leagues in the brief time he was there last year, and we think he will make the roster over Baby B this year. Once he gets more exposure, the fans in the D are probably going to love him. He obviously loves to connect with fans and is proud to be on the Tigers, so more power to him. Plus, he's kind of witty . Who doesn't love that?!

Clete Thomas (The Cleteus)



Ah, Clete. We're slightly embarrassed to say (especially after his performance last year) that we used to have a bit of a Clete Thomas Obsession. So much so that we hated Don Kelly when he came up for Clete in the 2009 season, and always scoffed at Rod Allen for his criticism. Now all of these feelings have passed, and it's time for us to get real about Clete's chances in the bigs this season. We don't think it's going to happen. Despite his redneck charm and deer-in-headlights smolder, Clete would have to have a hell of a spring training to beat out the likes of Don, Casper and Brennan.

Don Kelly (Don Kelly)

Don Kelly can do it all, and that's why he's definitely going to make the squad this year. He can play outfield, third base, first base, and supposedly catcher. There's no way, that with our surplus of injury-prone Venezuelans, we won't need a back-up in SOME position, and Don is the perfect guy to do it. As far as looks go, have you seen this guy in person? TV doesn't do him justice. Too bad he has the cutest kids ever...

Magglio Ordonez (Maggs)





The Tiger's answer to Fabio until he cut his hair, Magglio is the kind of player that makes both coaches and desperate housewives swoon (for very different reasons, obviously). We here at April in the D were terrified that last year would be his last in the Motor City, but Dombrowski flashed his genius once again and Maggs is here to stay (at least for the year)! Hopefully he doesn't run into any health issues -we all saw the affect his absence had on our team last year. So here's looking at a great 2011, Magglio--and please, grow that fabulous hair back.

Ryan Raburn (Ry Ry)

 


There's something about Ryan. You know what we're talking about. Just when you think he's starting to really suck big time, he goes crazy and hit .400 for the month of August. He claims that he does better when he knows he's going to play, and all evidence points that he's telling the truth. If he can be as productive as he was the tail end of last season, he's in for one monster year. We're rooting for ya!

Agree? Disagree? Let us know!